Just a simple guy flying somewhere away Who will follow me?
weibin_85@hotmail.com
Monday, October 31, 2005
Wind on my skin
My dad drives home a lorry most of the day - that same old lorry that I've seen since I was a kid.
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I used to shy away from it as a kid because I didn't like it when my friends asked me about it and I had to explain to them why we have a lorry. For a young kid such as I was, pride was one of the sins I held tightly onto.
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My grandfather owns a fruit wholesale centre in Pasir Panjang. That's how we came about to live in a terrace house. Yeah, the house belongs to him. This (relatively) big house that I've come to get used to belongs to my grandfather. The best thing about the house is that it has a big enough living room in which my family has a rather mini stereo system in which I can blast the music and dance wildly. Yeah... Legally speaking, it would then be inherited amongst his children. But the subject matter of this post is not the house.
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Throughout the years as I grew up, I've come to enjoy the moments whereby I get to be at the back seat of the lorry and Dad's cruising along the expressway. Just recently we travelled to Bukit Panjang to attend my niece's 'man yue' party, and there was this whole stretch of trees and the wind's just blowing on your face. The air was fresh from the evening rain and was cool from the vegetation all around. And I like having music along for the ride. So I get to enjoy the view, beathe in the air, relax my mind.
It is during these times that I dare to sing loudly in public. I know that even if I shout on the top of my voice and that voice goes haywire, the sound of the wind will buffer it away. It is then that I listen to songs such as Heaven (Hayley Westernra) that makes me think that life is beautiful. It is also during these times that I like to do reflections.
Ah, reflections. How I love them. I'd like to think of myself of thinking really deep thoughts. Thoughts on the meaning of life, on the reasons why I would want to go clubbing, amongst others of course. But with that return trip from Bukit Panjang, and furthermore from the trip yesterday to Suntec with my family for the 'Tourism Malaysia ~ Truly Asia!" exhibition, something new began to dawn in me. Oh, before I go on, we eventually booked a trip to Langkawi in late Nov. It's said to be the 'last trip' I would take with my family before I depart to Aust. I feel rather down actually. But anyway, thought. I was just looking around at all the people - couples, families, groups of aunties; scrambling around looking for a perfect deal to seal, that will bring them to a faraway place where they will indulge and relaxed. Where they will have fun and capture memories that'll see them through the years. Then I thought of myself, there I was, with a future that'll see me travelling across the globe (well, across oceans at least) to pursue something I've always dreamt of. And I didn't feel a thing!
On the return trip, I allowed the wind to slap my face, wake me up. It's happening! I'm going to learn to live independently! It's gonna be an experience of a lifetime! I'm flying away in 3 months' time! I get to study medicine! Oh well, reality it is, but after serious consideration, I think the reason why I can't bring up my spirits is because I know it'll be you guys I'd be missing badly when I go over. So much for wanting to fly away. There will be so many things I will miss, and one of these would be sitting at the back of the lorry, wind on my skin.
